In Extremely German News, a fast German car has gone faster than the older version of said car – and faster than a German rival to said car – around a German racetrack. The driver was, erm, a German. Das is sehr gut, ja?
Yes, the facelifted Porsche Panamera (which had to be tested in light disguise because it’s not been officially revealed yet) has done a lap of the Nordschleife in 7m 29.81s. That is, Porsche proudly states, 13 seconds faster than the very same driver managed with the pre-facelift, 550bhp Porsche Panamera Turbo back in 2016.
But it gets even more German than that. For a start, where the ‘Ring lap is measured from has changed since 2016. So, Porsche recorded two times, one for the 20.6km configuration, and one for the 20.8km layout used now. Whichever way you cut it, the new Panamera is faster.
Which model of new Panamera? Dunno. Porsche has cannily not let on whether it bolted test driver Lars into a standard Panamera Turbo, or the hotter (but heavier) Turbo S e-Hybrid. Either way, we do know the record was set on Michelin Pilot Sport Cup 2 tyres, designed specifically for Porsche’s big barge. They’ll be optional to buy for customers later this year.
Oh, and Porsche completely forget to mention that by whipping around the Green Hell in a mere 7 minutes 29.81 seconds, the new Panamera is a teeny-weeny bit faster than its sworn enemy, the Mercedes-AMG GT 63 S, which managed a pathetic, hopelessly tardy and woefully sluggish 7mins 30.11 sec. If you’re a businessperson in a hurry, 0.3 seconds over 20 kilometres can really add up, folks.
Expect to see the fully revealed Panamera shortly. Would you take the ol’ V8 beast, or the new Taycan EV? It, officially, is good for a 7min 42sec Ring time, in case that matters. Which it really does, if you’re German.
STORY Ollie Kew